Thursday, December 28, 2006

2006 Winner: Most Unappealing List of Job Duties

A two word phrase I never ever ever expected to see on a resume: "DECAPITATED HEAD."

(Please note: I am deeply grateful that someone DOES do this job. I am not slagging on the person who performs these duties. I just read them and hate my job a little less as it involves exactly zero preparations or transports of decapitated rabid animal heads. So I’m grateful for that too.)

From resume:

"Duties:

  • sanitized kennels daily
  • informed public of procedures involving quarantine when animal bites occurred
  • decapitation of dead animals
  • prepared dead animal head for rabies research
  • completed forms & reports for transport of decapitated head
  • participated in the euthanization of animals as required
  • accompanied kennel aide to landfill sites for disposal of dead animals
  • involved in extensive public contact with irate citizens
  • use of computer"

(For those of you who are keeping track, meaning none of you, this also counts as my "Thursday's Installment of Some Shit I Am Happy About." Because I'm pretty happy that my Task List today does not include taking dead animals to the landfill and then coming back to deal with irate citizens. Lordy I hope this person was paid well.)

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